Trucker Diaries is a visual documentation of my journey as a trucker. It depicts the dangers, the worries, the frustrations, and feelings I’ve had in the 3 years I’ve spent driving the roads of America. Even when teamed up with a co-driver, I found it to be a lonely job. Sensations of isolation were only compounded by my being both young and black in an industry that’s overwhelmingly dominated by middle-aged white men. My financial situation couldn’t afford my turning away from such a job though; to cope with my negative emotions I turned to my camera. As a documentarian I found comfort in taking note of everything around me. I found that it brought me closer to my environment and revealed an unseen level of intimacy. It was because of this desire to document that, through emotionally rough patches, I found slivers of serenity. By focusing on my camera I found a way to briefly escape and keep my mind at ease; even when it led to less favorable sides of the job. Chain smoking, abandoned pets, peeing in bottles, long nights, and road hazards were only the beginning. Having to maneuver my tractor-trailer around traffic and tight spaces brought about anxieties that would cause my shirt to become soaked in sweat. Having no time to breathe my way through and calm down I had to face my anxiety head-on in a game of mental chicken. However, despite any hesitations, I always found a way to make it through. Although this isn’t the life I want it has allowed me to become more of who I’d like to be.

1/22

© 2020 By John Adair Photographs